111 Girls Who Kick Ass, Number 7: Natasha Romanov

Before we get started, two quick things:

1. Yes, as a matter of fact, I do realize that a zillion and four other comic book geeks are probably tearing up the Interweb with their analyses and dissections of The Avengers this week. But you know what? BITE ME.

2. There are, believe it or not, an awful lot of girls on this list who are not comic book characters. I'll, um . . . start getting to them some other day.

Okay, full disclosure: Despite being one of the most unabashedly unashamed comic book geeks I know, I have never been a very huge fan of the Avengers. I mean, I admire them and respect them in the same way I admire and respect any other superhero team that's been around for almost fifty years, but I don't care about the characters the way I care about the X-Men or the Runaways. I just never have, you know?

Having made that clear, it may not be a surprise that I've never seen any of the movies that led up to this one. I'm not opposed to seeing them, and probably will someday, but right now I can't say I feel like I'm missing anything. Frankly, I wasn't even particularly excited about this movie until I found out about one element.

Obviously, that element was Joss Whedon.

If there's one person in the history of ever who can really make me care about Captain America or Iron Man or Thor or the Hulk or Hawkeye, it's him.

And I knew, just knew, he'd make Black Widow awesome. Sure, she might be the only woman on the team, but she would absolutely not be "the girl."

I was not disappointed.

For one thing, in her first scene she faces off against three arms dealers. They have tied her to a chair. Not only does she knock them all out, not only does she escape from the chair, she USES THE CHAIR AS A WEAPON (before escaping from it).

For another thing, if any other director had helmed this movie, you might expect there to be at least one moment where one of her teammates is genuinely surprised to learn that she kicks as much ass as the boys. That does not happen.

(Personally, I find it very interesting that she's the best fighter on the team. I'll say that again: She is the best fighter on the team. I mean, think about it. Iron Man has basically zero skill in hand-to-hand combat, since he really doesn't, you know, need it, what with having superstrength. Ditto for Thor and Hulk. Captain America does have military training, but she has much more experience than he does. And as for Hawkeye . . . well.)

For another other thing, when you get to the big fight at the end, you might expect her to be assigned to crowd control while the heavy hitters deal with the aliens. This does not happen, either. She plays a key part in defeating the aliens and, you know, saving the entire world from utter destruction.

For yet another thing, her scene with Loki blew my mind a little bit.

Finally . . .

Look, I don't know. Love him or hate him, Joss Whedon has always been very vocal about how and why he's a feminist. Everything he's ever done has featured at least one scene where a girl kicks ass (even if she's not a Slayer or a witch or a soldier or Kitty Pryde). I'm not saying my idea to write this list is entirely his fault, but he certainly had a lot to do with it.

Once upon a time, a reporter asked him, "So why do you write these strong female characters?"

And he replied, "Because you're still asking me that question."

Someday, if we keep putting women in superhero movies --- as superheroes themselves, not as love interests --- and letting them kick ass, maybe people will stop asking.

Because it'll just be the norm.





P.S. To the Morons Sitting Behind Me in the Theater Who Thought You Knew a Little Bit About Comics Because You've Seen Every Marvel Movie Ever Made:

That guy in the post-credits scene was definitely not Galactus.

No Love,
Ryan

111 Girls Who Kick Ass, 1 through 6: Runaways

Ah, Runaways.

I haven't paid much attention to this series in quite a long while --- Brian K. Vaughan and Adrian Alphona, the creators and "real parents," left it to do other things in 2007 --- but it is one of my favorite comic books in the history of comic books, a title it holds in no small part because of its several brilliant examples of girls who kick ass.

Before we talk about the girls themselves, I want to mention a few things about the series:

* If you love superheroes, Runaways is something you should read. If you love comic books but hate superheroes, Runaways is something you should read. If you're not really into comic books but are willing to give them a chance, Runaways is something you should read. Basically, Runaways is something everyone should read. The only way I can imagine anyone NOT loving it is if you're one of those people who just can't stand sci-fi or fantasy stories, as there is an abundance of both.

* Runaways is very special among superhero comics because, with a few exceptions, the team always has six members --- and only two of them are boys. Brian K. Vaughan's original pitch is very adamant on this point (his exact words are something like, "To hell with tradition!"); even after the line-up is shaken for whatever reason, it eventually settles down to four girls and two boys. So you sort of can't help looking at more popular mainstream books and asking, "Is this really that hard?"

* Honestly, as much as I love the series, it's difficult for me to talk about very much because a) it's one of those things where you'd really rather not spoil anything for a new reader and b) it only takes about three sentences for me to just lose myself and start gushing. It's that good. Basically, the only thing I say when someone asks me why they should read it --- other than the girls who kick ass and the involvement of a dinosaur from the future --- is, "It's about a bunch of kids who find out their parents are supervillains."

Alright, then. Let's get to it!

 

1. Nico Minoru

Apart from her wickedly good fashion sense (just look at that get-up), I primarily adore Nico for two reasons:

• She's a witch! Which she didn't even suspect until everybody found out their parents were evil. Any story about magic that's worth reading will eventually reveal that, while it may be ridiculously powerful, magic always has its limits, and Nico is a great example of that. She wields the mysterious Staff of One (which, by the way, lives in her SOUL until she uses BLOOD to draw it out --- intense) (also, there's at least one scene where she draws it out without cutting herself . . . because she's on her period; that kind of thing just does not happen in most superhero books), and can use it to do pretty much anything she can think of . . . once. HOWEVER. Throughout the entire series, it is subtly (sometimes not so subtly) implied that she'd be a lot more powerful if she knew a little more about magic.
•  She's Japanese, but she does not, for example, cast spells by drawing kanji in the air. That's refreshing.                    

Also, she eventually becomes team leader --- long story --- and, when a new member asks her if they have a rallying cry, like "Avengers Assemble!" or "It's Clobberin' Time!" . . . she thinks about it for a sec and just says, "Try not to die."

2. Gert Yorkes

• First of all, it is just so great to see a female comic book character who is not a stick. Furthermore, it is too great for words to see a female comic book character who is not a stick who is not just "the fat one." Gert is not merely comic relief. Well, I mean, she does provide a fair amount of comic relief, but that's because she has an acerbic wit, NOT because she's always stuffing her face with candy during fight scenes.
• Most of the first arc revolves around the kids discovering their powers and gadgets and whatnot. Even though her teammates include a witch and an alien, Gert may have one of the coolest "powers" in the history of comics: She has a very special pet . . .

3. Old Lace

•  Old Lace is from the 87th century (Gert's parents are time travelers). She has a nose ring. She's very intelligent. She's empathically bonded to Gert. Even if you ignore all of these facts, though, you can't get around the fact that she kicks ass just because she's a DINOSAUR.
• She reminds me of Quincy from FoxTrot, as both are cartoon animals who cannot talk. Also, they're reptiles who are not universally reviled.
• You may be wondering about that name. Originally, the kids gave themselves codenames because they didn't want to use the names their parents had given them. Gert chose "Arsenic" for herself. When Chase doesn't get it, she tells him to watch a movie made before 1985. Heh.

                    

4. Karolina Dean

•  Karolina is devastated to learn that she is an alien --- she's already been feeling different from other girls for a while, if you get what I'm saying --- until she discovers that she can fly. She's so excited by this that she literally starts crying tears of joy. It's one of my favorite scenes in the whole series.
• I don't know, I just love her. It's difficult to say why, exactly. Part of it is that she's a lesbian. I hate to spoil that for you right away, but . . .

5. Xavin

Honestly, Xavin is a fairly difficult character who you might love in one scene and want to slap in the next. But she makes the list for a rather simple reason: Xavin is a Skrull who shows up and reveals that he and Karolina have been betrothed for years. Their marriage will (theoretically) bring an end to the war their people have been waging on each other since before either of them were born. Karolina wants to help bring peace, but turns down his proposal because she likes girls.

Which, it turns out, is not much of a problem, since Skrulls are shapeshifters, and changing gender is about as big a deal for them as changing hair color.

6. Molly Hayes

While the rest of the kids are old enough to drive, Molly is only eleven --- so it's something of a happy accident that her mutant powers of superstrength and invulnerability manifest when they do.

That's right, she's an eleven-year-old mutant with superstrength.

So, when I originally envisioned writing this list, I was sort of determined to limit my choices to one girl from any given story/series/franchise/property --- for example, if I wrote about Buffy, I would have to leave out Willow. (Note: They will both be getting their own entries. Obviously.) The fact that I decided to relax that guideline is pretty much Molly's fault. She had to make the list, but I couldn't include her and not include Nico, and I couldn't include Nico and not include Gert . . . so, yeah, here they all are.

(You may have noticed that I haven't actually said too much about Molly. That was very much intentional. She may be my favorite part of the entire series, so I'd rather just let you read it and fall for her all on your own.)






Well, there you have it.

Actually, I'm not done yet! Another wonderful thing about Runaways is that, unlike so many girl-centric series, the boys are just as important. They may not be quite as powerful, but Alex and Chase and Victor are definitely not just "the guys."

So I guess what I'm trying to say is, if you haven't already read this series, GO READ IT RIGHT NOW. You'll be glad you did.

If you have already read this series, don't you think it's time you revisited it?

ALSO: If you're familiar with any other comics that feature female characters who are anything like as awesome as these six, I'd love to hear about them!

More later.